The Trauma of a Sexually Molested Girl

As I raised my face to have a better view of the person coming to me, I noticed her innocent but disturbed look as she walked majestically to me, a beauty to behold. When she sat down still wearing that tensed and worried look, I smiled at her while trying to create an enabling environment for our discussion to flow. She smiled back at me but behind those cute smiles were pain, fear, worries and a feeling of emptiness. I was wondering what could be the cause of that silent but loud pain behind the smile of a beautiful young girl of 17 years.
After asking how her day was, I introduced myself and told her that she should trust and confide in me because I was certain something was eating her up. She started with a deep breath and narrated the ugly true life story. She opened an invisible sore that she has been living with for good 9 years. She unwrapped the unacceptable parcel she’s been hiding inside of her for the past 9 years. She let me into the trauma that has been eating her up all these years. She shared the pain she suffered when she was only 8 years old. In her soft and trembling voice she said, “Aunty, there’s this thing that happened when I was 8 years and it’s really disturbing me. It’s a great pain in my heart and I don’t know what to do about it. When I was 8 years old, a man undressed me .....(short silence).
A man undressed me and did something to me and since then, my life seems meaningless. It’s so bad that I hate all men”. Immediately she said that, I could hear myself screaming inside but quite calm outside. “Oh! my God! God please, not again! Let it not be what I’m thinking”. I needed to be sure of what she was trying to say because whatever that happened 8 years ago was too terrifying and heavy for her to say. I then said, “My dear, I really need to understand exactly what happened. He sexually molested you? Do you mean that he had sex with you?” And she nodded with her eyes clouded with tears. I took a deep breath and remained silent for a while, with so many things running through my mind at the same time. I asked her if the man was a relative, she said no and told me that he was her class TEACHER in primary school. Her teacher sexually molested her in the school toilet. She ran back home to tell her parents. When the teacher was confronted, he denied of course and he is still going about his normal business freely, till today while this poor girl has been going through hell for the past 9 GOOD YEARS! It could be anybody and it could be anyone’s daughter. My heart still aches. My heart is so broken not just because of her case but because child sexual molestation is becoming a daily issue that is too difficult to handle. She was bold enough to share it with me but so many sexually molested children are dying in silence with the ugly incidence under their parents’ nose. I wish I could take that pain away from her that minute. Its way past midnight but I still cannot sleep because her face cannot fade away from my memory.
Dear reader, I had one of the saddest evening yesterday but I thank God that a soul was liberated from the shackles of resentment and destruction. The story above is a true life story of a young girl that was sexually molested at the age of 8 and she is 17 as at yesterday that I met her. She hid the pain she shared with me yesterday from EVERYBODY around her. Her parents waved the incidence away, not knowing that their beautiful tender girl clutched to it and has been growing and dying inside with it. After talking to her for a while and I asked her if she had any question and she said, “Aunty, talking about forgiving him, what exactly am I supposed to do when I see him? Am I supposed to smile to him or what? Just, just tell me exactly what I’m supposed to do because I still see him around and apart from this urge to wipe him off from the surface of the earth, I also have been planning to end my life but thank God that I met you today”. Tears were gushing out as she was talking and I couldn’t hold back my tears anymore. We clutched our hands together and sobbed. I spent my entire evening with her but my joy is that she left happy, full of life and ready to face her life with the plans we mapped out yesterday. When I asked her what she would want to be. When I asked her about her vision, I was so happy to hear her say, “Nurse”. And she truly has the calmness and personality of a care giver. I called her this morning and I’m so happy that she sounded so happy and excited quite unlike the first time she opened her mouth to talk to me yesterday.
Dear parents/guardian, some people living in this world are becoming so mean and cruel every minute of the day. Teach your children all they need to know about self-defense and ways to detect when an “uncle” has an evil motive. Please wake up from your slumber. Grow with your children to know when they are fighting an invisible battle. Keep an eye on a child that suddenly withdrew from the world to her shell. Go extra mile to be his or her best friend so as to know what he or she is battling with. If you’re reading this piece and you were sexually molested in the past, I want you to know that you’re still the rose. Stop hurting and don’t allow the devil to steal your joy and purpose because the truth is that you cannot move on successfully in life with resentment, un-forgiveness and a feeling of worthlessness. You must learn to let go, forgive him or her so that you can move on. There is a reason God brought you here on earth and you must not be distracted by the action of a beast in human form. Dear reader, if you’ve ever molested a child in the past or planning to do so, I will neither condemn nor curse you as many will do, rather I will advise you to repent from your evil lifestyle. If you’re a pedophile, if you’re working under the influence of unknown forces, please seek for urgent help before it becomes too late for you. Do not subject yourself to a CURSED life. Jesus Christ still saves and sets people free. Embrace him today and He will save and set you free because He loves you PERSONALLY.

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