‘Please Ada; I will like the ‘Aso-ebi’ for my friends to have blue background. The ‘Aso ebi’ for my in-laws should have a touch of red color, then green for my colleagues, yellow for my neighbors, lilac for my church members, pink for my neighbors’ As Joy was busy naming colors of uniforms popularly known as Aso-ebi to be used for her wedding , her closest friend Mercy interrupted her. ‘Hold on a minute Joy. What are all these colors for?’ ‘They are for Aso-ebi of course’. Joy replied. Mercy let out a thunderous laughter which got Joy a bit confused. ‘My friend, please wake up. This is twenty first and not eighteenth century. You don’t need all these colors because you already have wedding colors. Every other uniform should take a touch of one of your wedding colors.’ Joy looked at her with admiration and said, ‘That’s why I talk of you. Thank you my friend, you are quite on point’. With that they continued with the wedding plan.
Joy has been making preparations for her wedding for the past two months but she has been a bit worried.
Her worries increases as day goes by because Tony her fiancé is unperturbed about the wedding plans. In fact her main concern has always been his attitude and reaction whenever she brings up discussions on their supposed forth coming wedding. This has kept her so uncomfortable that she decided to discuss it with Tony. Later that same day, she met with Tony at their usual favorite eatery for lunch. After exchanging pleasantries, Joy went straight to the point. ‘Enhee! Tony, I have been meaning to ask you, what date exactly do you have in mind for our wedding?’ Tony changed his countenance immediately. ‘Joy please can we change this topic to have our lunch in peace? Please let us enjoy this afternoon by concentrating on something else. The last time you we had this discussion, it did not go down well. Why bringing it up again?’ ‘Please Tony, I am getting confused here!’ Joy interrupted. ‘We have been on this courtship for the past three years and you are yet to decide when to take me down the aisle. What exactly is going on here?’ Tony replied her in a very harsh tone. ‘Why are you naturally unreasonable Joy? I’m thinking of traveling to UK for my post graduate program and all you think about is wedding? Why this pressure? What about it if we have been on courtship for three years? You lack patience as virtue.’ He was still talking when Joy pulled threw her engagement ring at Tony, grabbed her hand bag and stormed out of the eatery in annoyance.
The above fiction is an example of troubles people go through when they rush into courtship unprepared. Before two people agree to go into courtship, they must be ready for marriage and that is the second step to courtship.
Step 2
THE RIGHT TIME FOR COURTSHIP
Only consider courtship at a time in your life when you are ready to consider marriage. Until that time-foster the virtue of friendship and hold off the romance until you are really ready for it. Do not talk of courtship when you are not yet ready for marriage because courtship is not meant to last for too long. You must be ready spiritually, socially, emotionally, financially and otherwise before thinking of marriage. For men, when you are not prepared for marriage and you happen to meet a lady you would love to marry, keep the relationship at platonic friendship level until you are ready to get married.
This is awesome n superb, I'm really enjoying this topic. Thanks ma.
ReplyDeleteRemain lifted Chidiebere
ReplyDeleteThank u ma,hav lean 4rm my mistake
ReplyDeleteRemain lifted Ada. You can also learn more from the 1st part of the article by clicking on this. http://houseofdivineassets.com/blog/courtship-and-steps-to-courtship/#more-154
ReplyDeleteI was actually wondering if u would fill my thoughts in in this, but уσυя last line's just done the work: ¢σz I got thinking "what if I meet the woman I think should be my wife but am not prepared †̥o marry yet?"And the end of the line says "...keeping the r/ship at platonic level until u re ready..." †̥o me that's very true and undoubtedly possible, but u see sometimes is very hard to keep it at that level. I always desire †̥o keep it that way but find myself defeated by this personal challenge arising from a combination of factors. I thirst for tips, if there re any, that'll enhance my attainment of that desire. I †нªηк God that I have lived in U̶̲̥̅̊я day...
ReplyDeleteWithout asking what the personal challenge is, I will start by telling you that there's a price attached to anything that is good and you can only pay this price by God's grace when you're rooted in God.Getting rooted in God yields a lot of benefits of which self discipline is one of them. Self discipline helps you to surpress sexual urge which is normal. Sexual urge in any man or woman is an indication that he or she is a normal human being. It only becomes a problem when it cannot be controlled and the frequency at which it comes up can be controlled. When one surrounds himself or herself with things like ponorgraphic materials, etc,it registers sexual activities in the subconscious mind of the viewer or reader and the urge surges up. But when one surrounds himself or herself with things of God. Self discipline becomes very easy.My tips are;
ReplyDelete1. Build a personal relationship with God and it will help you to remain focused not only on relationships but other aspects of life.
2. Be a man of principle by making some decisions concerning your relationship.
3. Always remind yourself that nothing good comes easy so that you can stick to your principles and maintain self discipline.
4. Because you're a human being that blood runs in his veins, avoid spending time with her in a secluded environment because you may be be tempted to embark on some sexual adventures that may not be healthy for your relationship.
5. Because we are talking about Christian relationships, its assumed that the lady in question is also a Christian. So, learn to build your faith and relationship with God together and by so doing, you will be mindful of obeying God's instructions especiallly on sexuality.
6. Avoid making promises on being together as husband and wife in the future so that her hopes wouldn't be built on you. The reason for this is because, you may decide not to marry her in the future due to one reason or the other and because you have made no promises,there will be no reason for guilt and your conscience will be at peace.
7. Always introduce her as a friend, even when people percieve her more than a friend in her presence, be fast in correcting them.
Oly, this is really interesting. Someone once said that we spend 4years in the university to get a certificate and spend no time studying marriage which is a lifetime institution where you are given a certificate before admission. Long courtship works for some people though, as long as they both have same goal and keep their eyes on the ball. Bless you.
ReplyDeleteDis is really a big lesson 4 youths. How I wish dt all of them will have d pportunity of reading these bf going into courtship & marriage proper. This is a great job u are doing. Keep it up. God bless u.
ReplyDeleteRemain lifted Chinasa
ReplyDeleteGod bless you too dear
ReplyDelete